Happy Jokes-4

Bride of 21st Century

A newly wed girl was being welcomed at the husband's home in a traditional manner.

She was asked to give a little speech. She addressed as follows

"My dear family members, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family", she said. Firstly, with my presence I would not want to create any inconveniences. I mean that I don't want you all to change your way of life, your routine."

"What do you mean my child?" asked the Head of the family.

What I mean dad is

Those who used to wash dishes must carry on washing them.
Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.
Those who cooked shouldn't stop on my account.
Those who used to clean should clean.

As for me, I am here just to entertain your son!

Happy Jokes-3

The housewife used to watch the neighbor's wife giving a kiss to her husband every morning befor going to work. She thought it will be nice if her husband did it too. One day she asked her husband, "Would it not be nice for you to kiss a lady before going to work every morning?"
The husband thought for a while and said," Yes, it will be wonderful if the neighbor's wife would let him kiss everyday".

Happy Jokes-2

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties to perform.

Terry had married a woman from America, and bragged that he had told his new wife to do all the dishes and house cleaning in the house. He said it took a couple of days but on the third day he came home to a clean
house and all the dishes were cleaned and put away.

James had married a woman from Australia and he bragged that he had given his new wife orders to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. He told them the first day he didn't see any results, but the next day it was better and by the third day his house was clean, the dishes done and there was a huge meal on the table.

The third man said the he had married a British girl. He boasted that the duties he had ordered her to do were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table every day. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little bit out of his left eye. Enough to fix himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher and call a landscaper.

Happy Jokes-1

Keeping Man Happy

To make a woman happy .....A man only needs to be

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A decorator
13. A stylist
16. A psychologist
17. A pest exterminator
18. A psychiatrist
19. A healer
20. A good listener
21. An organizer
22. A good father
23. Very clean
24. Sympathetic
25. Athletic
26. Warm
27. Attentive
28. Gallant
29. Intelligent
30. Funny
31. Creative
32. Tender
33. Strong
34. Understanding
35. Tolerant
36. Prudent
37. Ambitious
38. Capable
39. Courageous
40. Determined
41. True
42. Dependable
43. Passionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO
44. Give her compliments regularly
45. Love shopping
46. be honest
47. be very rich
48. Not! stress her out
49. Not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO
50. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT
53. Never to forget Birthdays, Anniversaries, Arrangements she makes

&

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Leave him alone